PATIENT: I want to lose weight doc.
DOCTOR: What do you think will help you lose weight?
PATIENT: Eating sensibly and doing exercise.
DOCTOR: Why don’t you do that?
PATIENT: I don’t feel motivated enough.
DOCTOR: You are Nigerian aren’t you?
PATIENT: Yes, I am doctor.
DOCTOR: Eat like a Nigerian and walk as often as you can.
PATIENT: How do I do that?
DOCTOR: Eat only Nigerian food, such as yam, okro, vegetables, water melon,coco-yam,beans, fish. Eat fresh food. Drink water, walk and also get fresh air.
PATIENT: Doc, I am addicted to cakes, chocolates, bread, bacon and eggs.Every afternoon, I eat a white french stick with fried mushrooms, and onions and bacon and a cool bottle of malt.
DOCTOR: What can I say?
PATIENT: I need help. O God help me.
DOCTOR: Say that again
PATIENT: I need help?
DOCTOR: After that…
PATIENT: Oh God Help me.
DOCTOR: If you ask for help believing that he will help you…he will.
PATIENT: How can I be asking for something so insignificant.
DOCTOR: It is most significant, food determines your health and well being.
PATIENT: I suppose you are right. O God, if you are listening, please teach me how to eat like a true Nigerian.
DOCTOR: Amen
PATIENT: Doctor, I am not going to eat refined sugar in my diet from now on, no coke, no cake, no Guinness, no harp, no cornflakes, no bacon, I will eat no refined food from now on…so help me God.
Doc, I know I can do this..
DOCTOR: I know you will do this.
PATIENT: I feel good about this. Do you think God heard my prayer?
DOCTOR: What do you think?
PATIENT: That simple prayer?
DOCTOR: The simpler the better.
PATIENT: Thanks God, I know you are listening, I will get a bible and find out about you. I will get a simple bible. I will keep it simple.
DOCTOR: Do that. Good bye.
PATIENT: (Aside) Did this doctor just preach to me? I don’t even believe in God, yet he answered my prayer? Next time, I will ask doc if he is a Christian, what do you think? Any way, I am going the real Nigerian way…no more aje butter. (waves to the camera) Bye Kachifo
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